And lo, I beheld before me a multitude of donuts, arranged on silver trays, plentiful and good. They glistened in their kind, the sugary glazed, the luscious frosting, the bursting creme-filled.
And I saw that they were good.
And I kept my hand at my side.
And I did not partake.
I closed my eyes and walked away, leaving the donuts behind me, casting them from my thoughts. For I knew that their effervescent purity disguised a veritable tub of lard and refined sugars.
And to honor my own sacrifice, to give some sort of meaning to my split-second decision, to make sense of my unexplainable actions, I declared that this would be a Year Without Donuts.
I will no longer partake of the holy donut. I will shun their sugary goodness. I will forsake the sprinkles of peace, I will close my eyes to the frosting of light.
I will be strong. I will give my arteries a rest. I will live an entire year without donuts.